“Self esteem is as important to our well-being as legs are to a table. It is essential for physical and mental health and for happiness.” ~ Louise Hart

It’s essential for you to realize that your level of self esteem will eventually determine the quality of your life and the level of growth and success that will be present in your life. By taking these five steps you will be able to boost your confidence, build your self esteem and improve the quality of your life.

Five Steps To Increase Your Self Esteem

1. Assume 100% Responsibility

Responsibility: Response- able, able to choose the response you want.

If you want to feel good about yourself and if you want to increase your level of self esteem you need to see yourself as the only one who’s responsible for your own feelings and emotions, as the only one responsible for your own happiness, health and well-being.  No blaming, no complaining, no pointing the finger. 

“People spend too much time finding other people to blame, too much energy finding excuses for not being what they are capable of being, and not enough energy putting themselves on the line, growing out of the past, and getting on with their lives.” ~ J. Michael Straczynski 

2. Change Your Mind

“We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves.” ~ Buddha 

We become what we think about all day long. So choose your thoughts carefully. Pay close attention to the thoughts you think and the words you speak. Think positive and empowering thoughts about yourself and about your life and you will feel good about yourself and life in general.

If you want to change your experiences, your life and if you want to boost your self esteem and confidence you have to change the frequency of your thoughts. All those crazy thoughts about you not being good enough, smart enough, skinny enough, etc., let them all go. Dump them all in the recycle bin. You don’t need them, none of them. 

3. Break Free From Past Conditioning

Your past doesn’t have to equal your future, unless you want it to. If you cling on to the past and keep on using it as an excuse of why you aren’t moving on with your life, then yes, your future will be very similar to your past and chances are that you will feel stuck and very unhappy.

On the other hand, if you give up the past and allow yourself to be present and engaged in your day to day life, while at the same time having a clear vision on how you want your future to look like, then your future will be nothing like your past. And in this process, you will feel so much better about yourself and your life. It’s all up to you. You have the power to decide. The future of your life is in your hands.

“In the process of letting go you will lose many things from the past, but you will find yourself.” ~ Deepak Chopra

4. Accept yourself completely

“Love yourself—accept yourself—forgive yourself—and be good to yourself, because without you the rest of us are without a source of many wonderful things.” ~ Leo F. Buscaglia

Work on accepting yourself completely. Be kind and gentle with yourself. Always remember that there is nothing about you lacking. In this moment you are enough, you know enough, you have enough. You are a beautiful creation, a work in progress.

5. Commit yourself to continuous learning and improvement

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” ~ Mark Twain

All the great people that have ever lived on this planet knew this to be true and. For as long as they lived they spent their time learning, developing new skills, new talents and improving those they already had. This is what self esteem is all about.

The more you learn, the more things you will be able to do and the more you will be able to do the better you will feel about yourself, your work and your life. There is no end to personal growth, and for as long as you’ll live, there will be something new for you to learn. The moment one person decides that is time to stop, that they already know enough because they are full

The moment one person decides that is time to stop, that they already know enough because they are full with knowledge, which will be the moment they will start dying little by little. The purpose of learning is growth, and our minds, unlike our bodies, can and will continue growing for as long as we shall live.

What do you think are the “key ingredients” to healthy self esteem? Do you think self-esteem and happiness related? I really want to know what are your thoughts on this. You can share your insights by joining the conversation in the comment section below 🙂

~love, Luminita💫


Luminita D. Saviuc

Luminita is the Founder and Editor in Chief of and also the author of 15 Things You Should Give Up to Be Happy: An Inspiring Guide to Discovering Effortless Joy. For more details check out the 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page.

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  • Maggie

    at 7:30 am

    I believe in the law of attraction. All I can say is Wow! Always amazingly helpful stuff on here! Thank you very much! 🙂

  • Ruth

    at 6:32 am

    I am thankful someone brought this to my attention on facebook. Awesome article.

  • Gretchen

    at 2:14 pm

    I really love your posts. They are a great motivation for me every day. This post is a great reminder to love yourself no matter what and take responsibility for how you feel, react, and live life. Thank you for your continually inspiring messages. I appreciate it.

  • danaadmin

    at 6:27 pm

    Happy to hear that Corinne. It’s the best thing one can do for his/her own person. If we don’t change, we don’t grow, and if we don’t grow, what happens then? We perish, and who would want that? Learning is a lifetime process. Hope to hear more about your journey of self discovery. Infinite Love and Peace

  • Corinne

    at 2:07 am

    This is so what I am learning now. How to stop the negative. Deal witht the hurts and move on. Learn everything again. Learn more. Be positive. I love it.

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