4 Reasons to Value Those Who Always Disagree with You

Even though we all enjoy meeting people who have similar interests and similar beliefs with us, we also need people who can disagree with us, so that we might make better decisions and understand each other.

Here are 4 reasons why disagreement is so important, and why you need to value those people who always disagree with you.

1. These are the people communicating with you

Whether you like it or not, disagreement represents one concept everyone can agree with. It means someone is listening and trying to talk with you.

You often see this when someone chooses to tell you how they feel, and why they don’t agree with you. While your first instinct is to feel threatened, at the end of the day this is a person who values your relationship enough to tell you that they don’t agree with you.

It’s not easy to disagree with someone. We’re all afraid of hurting people’s feelings or making situations worse than they need to be. However, some things need to be said, no matter how much we fear the consequences.

People take a leap of faith when they tell you that they disagree with you because they believe you are a person worth communicating to. It’s up to you to decide whether you should respond to their kindness with appreciation or disregard.

2. You need other opinions to see the world more clearly

It sounds tempting to be surrounded by people who agree with you and love everything that you say. It makes you feel that you have all the right answers to life’s problems, and it’s nice to feel that way. Unfortunately, that leads to close-mindedness and stubbornness, two things that can greatly interfere with your growth as a person.

For a start, you’re not always right, as unfortunate as that may be. If you only see the world through your eyes, you might not be thinking about the things you can’t see or the things you don’t know about. When people disagree with you, they bring experience, knowledge, and views that you may not have known about or understood. They bring new eyes to the table, something every good decision maker needs. You might not agree with what people say, but without people disagreeing with you, you wouldn’t be able to consider a lot of factors that you couldn’t see on your own. And even if it’s just one disagreeing voice, you’re seeing another viewpoint, and that is never a bad thing.

3. You can constantly refine your knowledge

People take stands on issues, which is a surprise to no one. What may surprise people is how often we act on our emotions, rather than actual facts. That doesn’t mean speaking with emotions is a bad thing, but it does mean you might twist a few truths or get facts wrong in order to make an emotional appeal. Incorrect information isn’t helpful for anybody.

When someone disagrees with you, you have to show why you think the way that you do. After all, if you can show where you stand through proper use of logic, reason, and evidence, people can accept your reasoning.

You might also realize that your reasons for disagreeing are too few, or are not as strong as you remember, so you do more research. With all the new things you are learning, you can refine your arguments, and even get the chance to teach people some new information. You should never stop learning, and people who disagree with you give you a good reason not to stop.

4. You know who you can trust

Disagreeing with someone is a great way to see a person’s true self. After all, everyone can act kind and nice, but when someone’s in a disagreement? That’s when any pretenses fade and you can see someone’s true self.

When you disagree with someone, you can see whether this is a person you want to be with and whether you can really enjoy being with them.

After all, the people closest to you are also the people whom you have disagreed with many times.

Disagreeing is important for ourselves and our relationships

Having someone disagree with you is never a fun feeling. However, it’s a necessary part of life and one that is very important to us, even if we don’t realize it. The people who are willing to disagree with you care about the relationship you have with them, and they also want to know you are someone they can trust.

You can also learn from people who disagree with you, seeing the world through the eyes of another person, as well as new information that you wouldn’t have known before. While you shouldn’t seek out conflict and start disagreeing with people, don’t avoid it when it happens, and face it head on. You will grow as a person, and you can find the right people for your life.


Victor Tan

Victor Tan writes to helps people overcome their weaknesses to be a better public speaker. He does this by helping people with self-improvement and teaching them proper speaking techniques. You can find him at his website, Spirit On Stage, Facebook and Twitter.

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1 Comment

  • Derrick Kwa

    at 6:52 am

    I love this, and it’s one of the downsides I’m finding about the web. It’s so easy for us to use social media to just connect with people who share our views, and get deeper and deeper into that bubble.


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