The First Person To Expect Love From Is Yourself!

“You can’t expect to draw people into your life who are kind, confident, and generous if you’re thinking and acting in cruel, weak, and selfish ways. You must be what it is that you’re seeking- that is, you need to put forth what you want to attract.” ~ Wayne Dyer

What is love? When I talk about love, I am not only referring to romantic love, but to all kinds of love. Love for your friends, your co-workers, your family, your neighbors, love for those who are similar to you but also love for those who might seem different from you. All forms of love.

Is there enough love in the world at the moment? Or should I ask, is there enough love in your world at the moment?

People will often answer “no” to this question, arguing that there is not enough love, not in the world and not in their own lives, blaming outside forces for the lack of love…

What I have learned over the years is that you can’t rely on love to come from other sources, from somewhere outside of you. You can’t expect love to be given to you in order for you to feel it, you have to feel that love from within first.

Most of us believe we need a certain person or we need a specific thing to happen in order for us to feel loved and loving but is that really the case? If we act like there is nothing we can do and if we are constantly waiting for something outside of us to provide us love, are we ever going to be happy?

Ask yourself:

What are my beliefs regarding love?

Who do I expect to give me love?

Where do I look for love?

What needs to happen in order for me to feel loved?

Do I love myself as much as I want others to love me?

Don’t be afraid to ask yourself all these questions and many others. Only by doing so you will be able to realize that you can’t expect others to love you if you don’t love yourself first.

“You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy.” ~ Unknown

The more you learn to love and accept yourself for who you, the easier it will be for those around you to love you…

~love, Luminita💫


Luminita D. Saviuc

Luminita is the Founder and Editor in Chief of and also the author of 15 Things You Should Give Up to Be Happy: An Inspiring Guide to Discovering Effortless Joy. For more details check out the 15 Things You Should Give Up To Be Happy Book Page.

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  • Jake

    at 4:04 pm

    This article has much truth to it. Having the opportunity to visit Israel this summer, I finally reached a place where I accepted myself and allowed to myself to feel self-compassion and self-love. I can’t even begin to describe the beauty that arose from revelation.

    Since returning from the trip, I have turned away from this feeling. Not intentionally of course, but I got myself caught up in my life. Reading this article has brought me back to where I want to be: loving myself so I can better love others. Thank you!

  • Gilbert lwesha

    at 12:09 am

    am motivated.there is hope in love the mails u send to me.very inspirational

  • Cher Cabula

    at 12:52 pm

    A good read right before I go to bed. This is gonna make me contemplate on some deep thoughts before calling it a day. Thanks for such a wonderful post.

  • George Pirintzi

    at 10:31 pm

    After a 20 year marriage and a break-up, you should consider taking time-out to discover who you are (as an independent woman) and do things which make you happy. Once you do that, you will discover that the ending of one relationship has given you the opportunity to attract a more powerful one into you life.

  • Dolores

    at 5:35 pm

    I agree with you Penny…but I guess it is time for us…

  • Dolores

    at 5:33 pm

    I need to start doing that so much more but have a hard time also….

  • Nikki (aka Starcat)

    at 3:47 pm

    Mmm, delightful post. Thanks for the timely reminders!

  • Jennifer

    at 2:46 pm

    So glad this landed in my email today. Coming out of a twenty year marriage has really shaken my self confidence and possibly my belief in lasting love. I know all these things in the article but needed a little reinforcement right about now. Thanks!

  • Cher

    at 2:04 pm

    I ran across a quote recently that, I think, is going to help me move big time in the self-love direction. “You yourself as much as anybody in the Universe, deserve your love and affection.” The author was Prince Gautama Siddharta, the founder of Buddhism!

  • Gail

    at 1:41 pm

    A few years ago I started refusing the negative tapes that would run inside my head of: “you’re not good enough”, “you’re unlovable”, “nobody likes you”, etc.. as soon as I realized I was thinking it I forced myself to say positive things about myself and tell myself I loved me just the way I am. At first it was hard and agonizing because I didn’t believe it. Then, I started accepting it, then really believing all the positive affirmations I said. Now, the negativity NEVER comes into my head and I have truly found self love and peace, joy, and serenity.

  • Amy

    at 1:26 pm

    Wow… this really hit home! The realization of this and how I am totally lacking in this area brought tears to my eyes too! It explains so many failed relationships in my life.. It’s going to be hard work and a daily consience effort, but I want to love myself and have love in my life! Thank you for this website, it it slowly changing my life!

  • Shannon

    at 10:35 am

    Hard to admit sometimes when you ate the center of your own problems. How can anyone else love you if you don’t love yourself. Thank you for these words this morning.

  • Penny

    at 10:30 am

    I am going to try this…. Just thinking how hard this will be lets me know I must do this. Thank you x

  • Emily

    at 4:47 am

    This literally brought tears to my eyes. Thank you


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